high maintenance???

i was email-chatting with my friends a while ago.. and we were chatting about high maintainance people.. those that only wants branded stuff and won't even look at pasar malam stuff kinda people laa.. suddenly a fren said that somehow she felt that i am somewhat a high maintainance kinda gurl.. and don't be like that?? owh.. this info is VERY SURPRISING for me..

since when i become a high maintainance gal?? musykil aku... i've been shopping at F*S and REJE*TS*OP for as long as i can remember.. until the boify was bored at me for not spending my moolah for myself by buying REAL stuff.. yeah i DO sometimes buy things - branded things for myself but boleh kire ngan jari.. and mostly during the SALE time.. like the zara wrap blouse that i bought at spore during their sale time.. hey, i got it for rm50.. it's cheap laa kan compared to zara m'sia yang ratusan itu.. itu berbaloi.. and i bought it after getting tonnes and tonnes of advice from another dear fren.. :) so does the hush puppies sandal.. cos my feet deserve a good shoes after almost a year i've been dragging it to the office :) other than that, wut did i spend brandedly??

the car?? well, i would have gotten myself a neo or gentoo if the home finance ministry allows me to.. the banker won't pay for the DP if i buy the cars stated..so thats how the deals for baby swift became a reality.. basically, i'm getting a car, banker chose which car.. and that's how i got to ask him to pay the differences.. :) good deal eyy..

best of all, i even don't mind when boify bought for me and himself identical rings at a flee market at the c*rve.. and it's a bday gift as well kan yayang?? so how did i become a high maintainace gal?? when i don't mind shopping at F*S or RJCTSHP, getting gifts from flee markets?? owh, if about purchasing an apmt, i am DEFINITELY a material gal.. cos i don't want to be spending a big sum of my moolah for a place i don't like kan?? better topup some more, then get a better one.. ye tak?

or is this about the guess sunglass that i bought?? well, i bought it during the retail theraphy session.. and for 50% less.. i only paid rm150 for a rm400 sunnies.. good deal wut?? and that levi's sunnies, dad offer to pay half of it as a gift for my 1st salary kan?

i know i've been spending unnecessarily lately.. but wut am i supposed to do? my dreams to save my money for wedding day turned out blurry.. unless everything is on track again laa kan.. right now, i just DON'T WANT to be thinking of saving for that reason alone.. dari aku saving tapi tak tahu hujung pangkal, baik aku takyah save dulu kan? bad thinking.. i know.. :( but, i don't want to feel the pain or hurt or wutever if i keep on saving but it turns out badly later.. baik aku pk pasal nak save yang ni semula bila menda dah clear dan pasti..

i know.. i know.. i know i'm alienated now.. many frens don't know who i am anymore.. i'm turning into an ice cold princess without my knowledge?? mebbi.. hahaha.. i know i'm not.. YET.. well, partly my fault.. or is it wholly my fault?? i'm in that stage of holding tight to my pile of strength which is -him- while i still can.. and i'm scared that i might lose my pile of strength one day.. and i am not ready for that.. i want to have him with me FOREVER.. but, the choice ain't mine kan? it's up to him to decide, and up to my fate kan?

so, wut is there for me? life ain't fair kan? and as for now.. retail theraphy really helps me.. although i know it will hurt me more in the long run.. but it's the best for now.. sorry guys if i'm turning to be a materialistic or high maintainance gal.. but it won't be long.. when my life is on track again.. i know wut makes me happy.. and i think you guys know it too :)